47 Comments

Thanks for the tips about being a responsible tourist, especially avoiding Airbnb’s. One thing I dislike about staying in a hotel is having to rely on restaurant eating three meals a day. It would be great if you could recommend lodging options that have a kitchen(ette)?

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I don't think that having a kitchenette should necessarily be one of your goals when traveling. Yes, I realize it's a nice thing to have, but it also means you are not spending money in restaurants and so contributing to the local economy. Pre-Airbnb none of us thought that having a kitchen was part of the plan of traveling. Buying prepared food and having a picnic in your room is definitely an option.

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I also agree about Airbnb's vs. hotels, but as people say ... when staying for a week or more, it gets really tiring eating out all the time. And when there are 3-4 of us, hotels get exceedingly expensive. Would love your thoughts on good places to stay in the areas you are most familiar with. Would choose another option if I could find them. Definitely look for an Airbnb that is owned by someone local when we do stay in them.

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As I said in a comment above, the affordability of staying in an apartment vs a hotel is a false economy since you are stripping away the very fabric of the city you are coming to visit. So I think that vacations to these places should involve staying at a hotel even though it may be more expensive. In the past we never expected to have a kitchen and budgeted our vacations to include meals out and stays in hotels. And then less people traveled and there was no over-tourism. Today that has all flipped and everyone thinks they should have an easy and inexpensive way to travel. That results in way too many tourists. Also: just because an Airbnb is owned by a local doesn't make it a better decision. It's still one less apartment on the market for locals.

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Staying in a hotel is practical if it’s only myself and my husband traveling for about a week. If we are traveling with the kids for more than a few days, renting an apartment is the only reasonable choice. We cannot send the kids to their own hotel room (even if getting two hotel rooms are affordable, which is rare), we need an option to have a non-restaurant meal (ie a kitchen), and since we’ve converted to traveling with only carry-ons (on your excellent advice!), we need a washing machine as well. What you are describing sounds terrible, but being able to rent apartments has been a game changer for parents who want to expose their kids to the magic of travel.

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I don't want to be rude, but your answer to the situation is basically saying it's not your problem. That you are willing to participate in a system that makes sure you have an affordable vacation even if it means stripping a city of its soul. My answer is that in certain cities (Rome, Florence, Venice, etc) you should not be able to rent an apartment. And until Italy enacts laws banning Airbnbs it's up to travelers to make the hard decision. Other options include shorter hotel stays in cities, balanced with renting a villa in the countryside. The 'game changer' you are talking about has been a complete and total failure if you are looking at it from the other point of view.

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Dear Elizabeth, it sounds like you are advocating that whole cities of Europe should only be accessible to people with grown or no children, OR only the people who can afford to stay in hotels for multiple nights. That’s not just rude, it’s elitist, and in your comment to be above, is shaming.

Surely cities can restrict Airbnbs so that companies are not allowed to own/operate apartments for short term rentals. And surely Hotels can do more to meet the market need/demand for rooms with kitchenettes or service apartments.

The gutting of old towns and European cities to meet tourism demand is a problem to be addressed, no doubt. But shaming parents who want to take their kids to see and experience the magic and history of different places, to open their eyes and hearts to cultures other than their own, is just wrong. And promoting that we should just be ok with going back to a time when travel was the purview of the wealthy? Come on. Surely we can find a better solution than that….

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I didn't meant to imply that families with children shouldn't travel, or that travel is the purview of only the wealthy. But the main problem seems to be that companies like low cost airlines and airbnb's are gutting European cities. One of the only solutions is to limit the number of tourists to those areas. And one of the ways of doing this is to limit the number of places to stay and make travel to some of the bigger cities cost more than €20 flights. One solution that I lobby for is to push for funding to develop lesser known regions - like Basilicata, Molise and Abruzzo - so that tourists can discover this side of Italy and bring their much needed spending there. I don't think everyone should be ticking off the Vatican and Colloseum. That approach is not sustainable.

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When our kids were young and we didn’t have a lot of money, we did home exchanges. Many memorable stays thru-out Italy, France and uk. Admittedly not for everyone - you have to be flexible about location and somewhat timing and you have to be comfortable having someone in your house. But many times, we felt like we were exchanging lives with host family. Our kids got taken to local soccer matches with the neighborhood kids, they had their first experiences (at 12 or 13) meeting Italian girls (didn’t know till after the fact) and we got to comfortably travel and experience a country in a un-touristy way. Highly recommended.

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Yes, I’d love to travel this way! It’s definitely something we’re open to.

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I’m with you Ann. See my response below 💜

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Thank you for your fantastic tips about how to be a better tourist. I agree with them all, but with a caveat about Airbnbs.

I have long found that so many hotels in Europe are overpriced and poor value for money. This has only increased since I’ve had children, and now I need more bed rooms, and I need to be prepared to feed little humans at any time of day or night so I need a kitchen, and a washing machine for all of the laundry. Hotels have become impractical.

However, when looking for Airbnbs, it is possible to look carefully and with consideration to find ones that are locally, individually owned and not owned by a company. It’s not perfect, but this can help the local economy.

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Unfortunately I think the answer is that it is going to be slightly uncomfortable or expensive to travel with your family these days if you want to be a good tourist. The problem is that the more affordable apartments that you are staying in represent a false economy. Yes, it's much more affordable for you, the tourist. But at the same time you are contributing to the pricing out of locals for that same real estate. Part of the larger problem is that more people are traveling to places that were formally unavailable. For instance 30 years ago, if you were traveling with your children you would have thought twice before deciding to spend time in Rome. The higher cost and the complications of eating in restaurants every night would have led you to perhaps spend 1 or 2 nights in a city, then find other solutions in a less crowded place (countryside, small village, etc) . The fact that you - and seemingly every other family - opts for an apartment in the big cities means that there are just way too many people.

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Also, I stayed at Masseria Potenti for a friend’s wedding in 2016, and it remains one of my most memorable stays in Italy. Gorgeous place, gorgeous food, gorgeous people. I recognised Maria Grazia immediately. Highly recommend!

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I would love to see a future post about local craftspeople.

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Me too! I will forego buying souvenirs if I can’t find something meaningful and from the place.

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I am really enjoying your newsletters, and insights about Italy. My husband and I are planning a month-long trip there, next October, 2025, for our 30th anniversary. We want to spend two weeks in the north, and two in the south, so two accommodations total. My challenge is finding accommodations for long term, with kitchenettes as well. Hotels are just not affordable for that long. Any suggestions? Thanks, Lisa

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I absolutely agree with all you say about being a responsible tourist. Having lived in London all my life, I’m seeing similar things here too. It’s so heartbreaking to see so much merchandise that’s been shipped over in a container from China. I’m shortly taking my 7th holiday in Venice; not been since 2019 and hoping there’s not a further decline. What I’ll be missing the most is your fabulous app. It was invaluable on my last 2 trips there. However I’m still staying at one of the recommended accommodations.

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Thank you for your kind words about my app Eat Italy. We are about to announce another version of these guides next week, so stay tuned!

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I agree wholeheartedly that tourists should stay in hotels and not AirBnBs. I live in a city that has had our rental housing devastated by AirBnB hosts buying up apartments in the densely populated downtown area with the result that housing for locals has become unaffordable. Fortunately both the civic government and the provincial government have banned short-term rental unless it is in the host's residence. I stopped using AirBnB more than 5 years ago after a series of last minute cancellations by hosts and we only stay at hotels. From time to time we stay in Aparthotels when we are in a city for more than a week so I can have my boiled egg for breakfast. Even though we have a kitchenette, we only use it to make breakfast as I much prefer to eat locally and frankly, I'm on holiday and don't want to cook when I could sample the local cuisine. In France there are often hotel rooms with coffee makers so we routinely book these for shorter stays and have coffee and croissants for breakfast. There is always a boulangerie near by!

Please continue to encourage people to avoid AirBnBs - they are having a destructive impact on cities and people who need affordable housing. Another good example of unintended consequences.

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Thank you for your comment! I hope that Italy will start enacting some regulations sometime soon. I fear it may be too little too late.

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It’s interesting that people used to urge tourists to stay in apartments rather than hotels for a more authentic experience and now the pendulum has swung the other way. Presumably because the apartment then was owned by a local resident and the hotel by a larger, not local corporate entity (?). I don’t want to blame the latest problems all on air bnb because it is just a symptom of a bigger problem which is affordability, which is not air bnb’s responsibility. They offer a product that people want. For myself, for a short stay of less than 5 nights a hotel is fine, but I do not like the choices most hotels offer at breakfast and cannot stomach them for more than a short stay (too much food, and definitely too much sugar). Also part of the joy of being in an Italy is cooking with the local ingredients. That’s not possible for a hotel stay.

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Totally agree that yes, we used to urge people to stay in apartments. And I am guilty of that. The problem is not Airbnb's fault, but the total lack of regulation on the part of local and national governments. Of course Airbnb offers a product that people want. Now it's up to people to say no, once they realize the damage that is being done. As a side note: You do not have to eat breakfast in the hotel, since it is almost always an added charge. Many bars in Rome these days offer breakfast (not just pastries).

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"Conclave" is fantastic. Fascinating story--it almost feels like a thriller--with marvelous acting. And ultimately so moving.

If you want to find artisans, I recommend Homo Faber, a collective of artisans with a website from around the world. I've used it to locate artisans in Venice and Florence. Also, in Venice, try taking a look at the Venezia Autentica website.

Elizabeth, you are so right about being responsible tourists. My husband and I visit Venice and Florence every year for a month (2 weeks in each location), and we always stay in our favorite small hotels. As we're older, eating three full meals a day is overwhelming, so we have our breakfast in the hotel (unlike France, breakfast is included at most Italian hotels), and we have our main meal at either lunch or dinner. The other meal is usually something small, like ciccheti, sandwiches, and a spritz or wine at a place like Al Merca or Gia Schiavi (both in Venice) or a small portion of taglierini with truffles and a glass of Brunello at the upstairs food court in the San Lorenzo market in Florence. (The walking and wonderful discoveries we make along the way, whether, art, churches, or shopping, always takes care of any worry about extra added pounds! )There are lots of delicious options, and I love not having to cook while on holiday. We search out local artisans for gifts, and the visits and conversations with them are always memorable.

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I love your way of traveling!!! (also love Homo Faber!)

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Nov 1·edited Nov 1

I appreciate your tips on being a responsible tourist. I’d love to have recommendations regarding where to buy souvenirs and gifts from local craftspeople in Italy, particularly Florence and Rome as I’m heading there in a week.

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Nov 3·edited Nov 3

Thank you for bringing up the issue of short-term rentals. I live in a seaside resort town in the US and short-term rentals are pricing out locals and changing the fabric of community. Increasingly, we have a situation where teachers, nurses, firefighters etc. cannot afford to live in our small town. We travel internationally with our young children, and we always stay in hotels or inns. We don't travel often, and we budget accordingly. Another thing to consider is that hotels are frequently inspected for safety. Often, short term rentals are not. We had a tragedy in our town that resulted from a Vrbo that was not equipped with working smoke detectors. Short-term rentals may save the traveler money, but unfortunately the costs are borne by the destination city.

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Very wise words, especially that the short term rentals save the traveler money, but the costs are born by the destination city.

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We live in a university town that is also a wedding destination and suffer from the same exact thing. Not to mention never getting to invest in my neighbors bc they are all short term rentals.

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On our first visit to Italy as a couple we stumbled upon a wonderful little town Pienza, which seemed like Mecca to a throng of Italian families (I think it was on a Sunday). We decided to follow them and found many shops - primarily food - and we loaded up on delicacies to bring home in two days. Unfortunately, US Customs had another idea and we were forced to toss many great things at the airport! (A gorgeous wild boar salami!). I suggest a bit of caution on purchasing food stuffs as gifts…

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Whenever I write about taking home food as gifts I am always very aware of current USA regulations for importing food. They are changing all the time and I keep on top of them. I'll write an upcoming post about it, and make suggestions as well as link to the regulations. There is NOTHING worse than having your salami taken away and thrown in the garbage. ;)

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Couldn't agree more about Airbnb. When traveling with all three kids, we usually have to rely on them because booking several rooms per night at a hotel is cost prohibitive. But I always search for small places that have family rooms first! I wish more hotels would offer these types of rooms so I could be done with Airbnb forever.

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That is an excellent suggestion.

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I love your tips on being a responsible tourist but I have some thoughts about air bnb. I use air bnbs specifically to have a more authentic experience.

In Paris, my two friends and I stayed in an apartment and the lady who owned it was there with us throughout our stay - it was her apartment that she had lived in her entire adult life and she invited guests to use her spare room from time to time. It was our first time in Paris and staying with her was the best decision we could have made - she gave us an insight to her life as a Parisienne, gave us tips you wouldn’t have found in a guide book and we got to experience a real Paris apartment in the 9th.

In fact, I’m writing this comment from an air bnb in Turin. The host greeted us personally - we’re staying in his wife’s apartment now that they live together in his. They’re both Torinese, he’s a fire fighter and she’s an accountant. We’re getting to experience how people live in Turin, and the little quirks of Italian apartments that differ to homes in my own country.

I think instead of banning or avoiding air bnbs, they should be regulated. Companies shouldn’t be allowed to buy up housing stock and rent it out on there. I don’t know how it could be enforced but in my opinion air bnb is a good thing (perhaps even better than hotels) when it’s used by individuals who will be away on vacation themselves, have a spare room or are lucky enough to have a second home elsewhere and their apartment is free.

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I totally understand what you are saying, and am glad you had an authentic experience. But it still perpetuates a severe housing crisis even when locals are renting out rooms and/or apartments. The lady you stayed with in Paris? Her room would probably have been rented out for less money to a student in the past. Student housing in Paris is now almost non-existent. The apartment you stayed in in Torino? It's real estate that in the past would have either been sold to another local to live in, or else rented to a local. Since it is now and airbnb it is - like most of the real estate - off the market for locals. So while it is working out nice for you to have a great local experience (and it does sound like you had a great trip) it is creating devestating effects on the real estate market for locals, much of which can never be undone. Yes, I agree there should be more regulation. But in the meantime I believe being a good tourist means being aware of what the effects of having an 'authentic' experience can be.

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Thank you for your recommendations on being a responsible tourist and for encouraging us to be responsible citizens and vote! 🗳️

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